If someone comes up to you for advice, the best and only to way give any guidance, should be without expectations. Why?
Here’s someone who wants to know from you whether to do xyz or not. The following 4 outcomes are possible, assuming they follow your advice.
- You suggest they do xyz. They do it, and good happens. You were right, but they will attribute it to themselves.
- You suggest they do xyz. They do it, and bad happens. You were wrong, and they will attribute it to you.
- You suggest they do not do xyz. They don’t do it, and bad happens. You were wrong, and they will attribute it to you.
- You suggest they do not do xyz. They don’t do it, and good happens. You were right, but they will attribute it to themselves.
In all cases, you get no recognition. Does that mean we stop helping others? Absolutely not. But when we do so, we must have the best intentions in mind while guiding them, whilst having zero expectations. The end result is not in our control. And so expecting praise in return is foolhardy.