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Month: May 2022

Peace of mind

We are constantly worrying about the future, aren’t we?

How will I perform in a new job? How will I perform in a new family setup? How will my kids do? Will my family be able to cope? Will I be able to deliver my presentation well? Will I be able to get a promotion? Will I clear my impending exams and certifications? Will I be accepted by my peers and colleagues? Will I be able to provide for my family?

And on and on and on these questions go, with hardly any clarity.

And to make matters worse, with each passing day, more and more questions only keep getting added on to the pile.

Then how to get rid of these?

You can’t. That’s the simple answer.

The solution? To keep the mind occupied elsewhere. That’s the only way. I observe this in my Guru. Nearing 80 years of age, he spends not even one waking minute in isolation, thinking and wondering about the future, but is instead always engaged in karma yoga, action here and now. We just need to imitate.

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Renovation

We were doing some home renovation recently.

Workers would come in at 10 am, and work all the way till 9 pm. A few breaks for chai and lunch and the like.

But work they would. It’s brutal, painstaking, physical labour. Painting, carpentry, plumbing, masonry, you name it.

And they would work 7 days a week. Why? Because they are daily wage earners. One day off means one day off their wages as well.

They’re probably a 2 day train journey away from their families. So they have everything to crib about.

And yet, they take the time to smile and joke and laugh among themselves.

The actual work they do is not what is valuable. The attitude that keeps them happy inspite of it, is what is truly priceless.

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Scientific monkeys

We know we get nervous before important situations in life. How to understand this? Centuries of evolution has made the human brain react to circumstances in one of two ways. 1 – Monkey, or 2 – Scientist.

When in Monkey mode, the brain is scared, escapist, releasing cortisol and looking to run. In Scientist mode however, it is calm, relaxed and looking to learn.

How do we maximize Scientist mode over Monkey mode? We can learn from Firefighters. The first fire breakout for a new firefighter is a scary experience. But as s/he gets to their 20th fire, which could be 10x bigger than their first, they are cool, calm and collected. Why? Because they are prepared and have seen this before.

Therein lies a clue. Preparation helps. Like if you are scared of the time-crunch of a 3 hour exam, practise taking tests within 2.5 hours itself. Laughter helps too. No better way than laughing about a problem you are going through. All of this is maya anyway, and really doesn’t matter in the long run. More laughter = less cortisol!

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How much to donate?

Took a rickshaw ride to the metro station today. Turned out to be a very expensive one. Instead of paying x, I paid 10x.

Why? Because the rickshaw driver got a 10-second call in between, told me he just got news that his wife delivered twins, and congratulated himself. He then said all was good till 5 days ago when his father passed away. And that his wife was in ICU and that he had no money to buy her medicines. He wiped a (possibly) non-existent tear from his left eye too, whilst slapping his forehead a few times.

I gave him a little cash, and he asked for more because “medicines are expensive”. I told him that’s all I had, and he motioned to the QR code stuck on his vehicle and said I could transfer the money to him. To which I reminded him that the meter showed x, and that I’d just paid him 10x.

Even 10x really wasn’t a very big number – hardly anything. Maybe I should have been more generous – because what if he was being genuine? But some of this also seemed like it was pre-rehearsed. Was he lying? Was this a scam? I have no clue. No way of finding out.

My Guru says a) donate 10% of your post-tax income, and b) to make said donation only to the cause he has selected (education for the underprivileged). Why ‘only‘? Because he has already done the research, and knows the practical difficulties of trying to help everyone and supporting every cause. While ad-hoc folks asking for money like the example today is not uncommon in India, following principles ‘a’ and ‘b’ is what gives me peace of mind.

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Shifting gears

As someone who likes to drive, I’ve always been fascinated by car gears. Some have 4, some 5, some even 6. And there are those that have Reverse gears on the top left, and some on the bottom right. You know what I mean.

But I saw this crazy video recently of a long-haul truck, with wait for it, 18 gears! Eighteen! That is just insane.

But the number 18 is interesting. It is also the number of chapters in the Gita.

And regardless of the vehicle, just like we shift gears one to the next, once the destination has been reached, there is no alternative but to bring it to neutral.

Just as in the Gita, we can go from one chapter to the next and back, but ultimately, we’ve to reach nothing but the neutral state. One of permanent stability and everlasting peace.

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Inflation

There’s inflation everywhere now.

The whole world is talking about it, and the whole world is reeling from it as well.

Many shelves are empty, especially electronics with semi-conductor chips in them.

In developed countries, wage inflation is so rampant, that 5 star hotels have stopped room service, and many restaurants and bars have been clubbed together.

Inflation is pinching everyone.

But there’s one type of inflation that pinches the most.

And this is called the inflated ego. No explanation necessary šŸ˜„

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Scare tactics

My Guru has this very funny joke.

He says that if you don’t like someone for whatever reason, and want to get rid of them, then what is a foolproof way?

  1. just invite that person home for a satsang, and give them a copy of some scriptural book.

    It is quite likely that that person will never come back again.

    And if they do…
  2. Pick up another copy of the same scripture you gave them, and ask them if they read chapter 5 or 6 or whichever.

    That’s a foolproof way right there – so much fun even in spirituality!

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Ableknowledge

How much do we really know?

We think we know a lot. Sometimes we feel like we know everything. And that others around us know very little. Especially if there is a new joinee on the team.

It used to boggle my mind, that for the IIT JEE, probably the most competitive entrance exam in the world, the top scorer would often not score even 50%!

It still boggles my mind.

In chapter 7, verse 1 of the Gita though, the Lord says he will give Arjuna the complete knowledge. There will be no doubts. He just needs to set his ego aside.

Isn’t this awesome?

The highest knowledge is that, in which there remains no curiosity, which is not followed by any logic and which leaves no room for imagination.

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Give or take

There’s this YouTube video with several million likes.

Its premise is this. The protagonist is out on the street, asking for a few dollars from passersby.

Most avoid him like the plague. Not surprising.

But the catch? He gives 100x back to anyone who gives him any money.

One guy gives a dollar, and gets back 100$. A lady gives 10$ and gets back a thousand!

People are so damn happy when they get the money, totally unexpected.

But there’s just one lady at the end of the video, who not just gives the protagonist some money, but also refuses to take the 100x. “Pay it forward, to someone who needs it more”, she says.

Would have been so good to have more like her, but clearly such people are rare. There are more people that would take a 100x from someone they don’t know. But lesser than those who would not stop to help in the first place šŸ¤·

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Stone throw

We know this story, but it is worth recollecting again.

There was a wise woman traveling in the mountains. She found a precious stone. The following day she met another traveller who was hungry, and the wise woman opened her bag to share her food. The hungry traveller saw the precious stone at that time, and asked the lady for it.

She handed the precious stone over with zero hesitation. The traveller left, happy like never before. He thought he was now set for life.

But he came back shortly thereafter, to return the stone to the wise lady.

Why? Because he told her he wanted something even more precious than the precious stone. What could that be?

Only the ability and attitude to be able to give away something so precious in the first place.

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Prayers don’t work – part 2 of 2

Okay, time for the big reveal!

What 5.14 is saying, is that the Lord doesn’t interfere in our karmic world, or our actions and reactions. However, this “Lord”, is nirguna (no gunas, i.e. no qualities), the formless nameless substratum of all existence, aka Brahman, Paramatman etc.

The prayers we offer however, are not to this nirguna Lord, but to the so-called ‘lower’ deities. These deities like Hanuman or Ganesha or Shiva and so on are all part of the same formless “Lord”, but they had also taken up specific forms for specific purposes in this world. It is believed they still exist, albeit in an astral body / energy form, and that is why we pray to these deities for various reasons. Like to Ganesha to get rid of obstacles, to Hanuman for victory and fearlessness and so on.

There are also various rules that have been codified. Such as if there is a 5-syllable mantra like Na-mah-shi-vaa-yah, and it is chanted 5-lakh times with faith and devotion, then the deity will manifest. These rules are all created by the Original Creator aka the nirguna Lord, but he does not participate in them. Neither are we praying to him, because he can’t be encapsulated, not even in words!

This is why my Guru’s trick-question is such an outstanding one.

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Prayers don’t work – part 1 of 2

In verse 5.14 of the Bhagavad Gita, Krishna says that the Lord does not interfere in the karma of anyone. That nature alone functions.

Many years ago, my Guru threw this to me as a brainteaser. He asked, “When the Lord is so clear that there is zero interference, and that we each sow what we reap, then why do we pray?”

The answers to this confounding question often go something like, “We pray so that we ask for more faith, more strength, more spiritual awakening etc. etc.”, primarily in an attempt to tie it away from material matters.

However, even these don’t answer it fully, because the Lord says he doesn’t interfere at all, no matter whether for infusing money into our pockets or more faith in our hearts!

What could the answer be then? Revealed tomorrow, after you’ve had the chance to give it some more thought šŸ™‚

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Desert rose

“Oh desert rose eh ley hi ey ley…” crooned the legendary singer Sting many years ago.

I have never figured out the words after ‘rose’, but that’s digressing from the point.

No one likes deserts no? Not desserts, which are universally loved (except by the 22 year old trying desperately to get his abs to show!), but the dry arid landscapes that parch your throat just by thinking about them.

A dry barren dune-filled land is always considered infertile and useless. “What will anyone do with such a place?” is the first thing that comes to mind.

But even weaknesses can be turned into strengths. That’s my learning. We know this, but still get dejected in the face of adversity. Here’s a nice line I saw about the Indian state of Rajasthan, as part of a tourism advertisement.

“A pioneer in the green revolution (to generate solar energy) in India with 300-330 sunny days a year, which is comparable to the deserts of California and Nevada!”

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Stomach prayers

It’s a common sight at the Big Fat Indian Weddings.

There’s a lot of food, like truckloads of it. And often spread across 4 or 5 days.

After a recent wedding, many people fell ill, suffering from food poisoning and sore throat and what not.

The immediate thought is to pray to God for these people, and hope that they will not suffer too much.

The next thought though is, why to bring God and trouble him with these petty things? Aren’t we mature enough to know what to eat, when to stop eating, what constitutes ‘moderation’?

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Ageless

If you are middle aged and have many years of experience, would you work for a teenager? Probably not, right? Huge career risk perhaps, and their lack of experience means you may not learn much. Besides, working for someone that much younger than you could be a bit weird.

That thinking is passƩ now.

No I’m not saying this frivolously.

I recently discovered that one of the hyperlocal apps that I use is a billion dollar company run by two teenagers!

Of course no one can see the future and how risky it can be. But surely in this day and age, age is no bar. Execution of an idea (perseverance, patience) trumps everything else. Good advice for spirituality as well.

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Beyond home and work – part 8 of 8

Continued from yesterday:

How has Satsang helped me?

It has brought discipline to my life.

Satsang has made me less concerned about money – not that money doesn’t matter, but my happiness doesn’t revolve around it as much.

Satsang has given me more peace, and the ability to step back and look at situations more holistically, and not being sad immediately or for too long if something doesnā€™t happen the way I expect it to.

Satsang has made me a part of larger community – there are so many close friends here in satsang, it is more like a huge extended family.

Very importantly, satsang has brought a noble / everlasting mission and direction to life, beyond just the mundane home and work.

Last but not least, through the Guru’s grace and blessings, satsang brings miracles not just sporadically but daily.

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Beyond home and work – part 7 of 8

Continued from yesterday:

And satsang isn’t just about singing bhajans, or chanting mantras or some other boring sounding stuff.

Then what does satsang help us give up?

Satsang helps us give up our anxiety, our stress, our jealousy, our anger, our greed, our fear.

Satsang helps us do our dharma.

How?

Most people say dharma is religion. No dharma is not religion. Dharma is really the art of balance.

How to balance all the taking with the giving, that is dharma. and that is why satsang helps us in our dharma.

Continued tomorrowā€¦

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Beyond home and work – part 6 of 8

Continued from yesterday:

Imagine you had to setup a justice system, your own justice system. You are the Chief Judge. Thatā€™s right. You decide the law. You are the law! Would you favour the ones who are only taking-taking-taking? Probably not, right?

How does this get balanced out? Because at home we are taking-taking-taking, at work also taking-taking-taking – money, bonus, position etc. Then when to give?

That’s exactly what satsang can help with. – to kickstart our giving process, and also the giving-up process. To give-up what? Your money? No, SS doesn’t need your hard-earned money.

Continued tomorrowā€¦

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Beyond home and work – part 5 of 8

Continued from yesterday:

So here is something for each one of us to think about deeply.

Everything we each have succeeded in today, can we really say with 100% confidence that it is all solely because of us? The marks we got in school? Yes we studied of course, but teachers helped, parents helped, someone wrote a question paper, someone wrote a book, someone invented or discovered something that could be written about in the first place – and on and on!

Same for the bonuses and promotions we got at work, somebody trained us, someone recognized us, someone provided us with a job to be, someone invented a computer decades ago, without which much of our work wouldn’t even get done!

It’s not that we should not get credit for our actions, but think about it, and we’ve really just been taking-taking-taking from day 1.

Continued tomorrowā€¦

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Beyond home and work – part 4 of 8

Continued from yesterday:

One-and-a-half hours later, there was still no respite, and people started getting angry and stressed. Some were shouting, others were fighting, some started live-tweeting their frustration, babies were crying – it was just total and complete chaos.

And it was immediately evident, that even outside of home and work, stress and anger can cause the entire day to become unproductive.

Because yes this got sorted and people checked-in and all. But even after the flight was over and we landed at the destination, there were some people arguing with each other about having cut in front of them into the line in the morning and how they have no manners and such!

Continued tomorrowā€¦

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Beyond home and work – part 3 of 8

Continued from yesterday:

It might seem that satsang and its benefits are important in two large parts of our lives, home and office.

This is true of course, but if you draw a Venn diagram, you’ll have one circle with Work, another circle with Home, and the part where both intersect (that post-2020 is called work-from-home!).

But even outside of that, there is life and so much stress and anxiety, and really there is no aspect of life that satsang cannot touch and transform.

I recently had to take an early morning flight. As early as 3 am, there were serpentine queues, with people of all ages waiting to check-in. There were literally 100s of passengers, and just two open check-in counters. Crazy isn’t it?

Continued tomorrowā€¦

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Beyond home and work – part 2 of 8

Continued from yesterday:

For many of us, the question will be, ā€œReally? Is there even anything outside of work and home?ā€ ā€œWith weekdays and weekends both just flying past in a complete blur?ā€

But there still are things that frequently upset us ā€“ like:

  • struggling with our workout schedules,
  • not being able to take vacations, or even worse
  • taking vacations but mentally still being unable to relax;
  • or we may have doubts on what the right decision to make is, given a certain set of circumstances;
  • or there may be an inability to maintain true friendships – we may be online all the time on social media, and yet feel extremely lonely and disconnected,

and on and on and on….

Continued tomorrowā€¦

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Beyond home and work – part 1 of 8

Recently, I was given the opportunity to address a youth satsang session on the topic ā€œSatsang beyond home and workā€. Here is the gist of the contents, split over a few parts, just to make it easy to consume.

ā€œYou remember those childhood days where we used to play some sport with a bat and a ball? And there’d be 3 kids, one would own the bat, the second would own the ball, and this third kid would own neither and so he only gets to be the fielder!?

Well I’m the fielder today, because after two very powerful talks on satsang @ home and satsang @ the office, I’ve got this task to field every other life situation that falls neither under the office or under the home.

For many of us, the question will be, ā€œReally? Is there even anything outside of work and home?ā€

Continued tomorrowā€¦

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Classy

As I board a 16 hour flight for a business trip, I see people seated in different parts of the airplane.

The majority are in Economy.

The minority are divided between First and Business.

Everyone reaches the same destination, no partiality there.

But the journey? Vastly different, whether quality of service, legroom or food and beverage options etc.

No different than life outside an aircraft.

The end game is fixed. But the journey is what matters – what we do, what we make of it, and how we impact those around us.

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Smile and a wave

My building’s watchman today gave me a smile and a wave. So did his wife.

I was traveling, and hence hadn’t seen them in a few weeks.

It doesn’t mean much, someone smiling. Big deal. Even though many people choose to keep morose faces throughout the day.

But this ageing couple smiling and waving is special.

Just a couple of days ago, the watchman’s wife went into cancer remission. As if that wasn’t bad enough, the watchman suddenly got heart problems and needed to be operated upon immediately.

Do these guys have enough money saved up for taking care of their healthcare needs? Certainly not. What do they do? Take a loan of course. And you can be sure that their interest rates aren’t pretty.

They have it tough right now. Really really tough.

And yet they are able to smile and wave. What a mindset!

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Godliness lonliness

While checking out from a recent hotel stay, the receptionist, a man in his 50s, suddenly asked if I believed in God and in miracles.

Why would he ask me such a thing out of the blue? I really have no clue.

He told me, that two decades ago, he had to go to his hometown, a small village in India.

Due to transportation delays, he only managed to reach at 3 am, and was dropped off in the middle of nowhere, and it was dark, raining and potentially dangerous.

With an infant in his arms, and his wife in tow, he prayed for a miracle. In 5 minutes, he said a man appeared seemingly from nowhere. He managed to find an auto rickshaw for them, negotiated a decent rate, and even rode with them all the way to their final destination.

The receptionist then said, that as soon as they reached their home safe and sound, and stepped out of the auto rickshaw, within seconds, that helpful man was nowhere to be seen. Poof. Gone. He was convinced that man could have been none other than God. What do you think?

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PeaZzzz

Saw the craziest thing today.

Was stuck in a traffic jam for what seemed like ages.

Everyone there was frustrated, irritated, angry, and likely hungry too.

The tension in the air was translating into louder and louder horns.

Much like a glass filled with stones still has space for sand, the road too with large trucks and buses was choc a block full with bikes, cycles and pedestrians.

There was literally nowhere to go. It was completely maddening, with nary a second of silence.

But to my amazement, in the corner on the pavement, was a hairy homeless man. He was fast asleep, totally unbothered by the din around him. A peaceful smile covered his face, and if he didn’t awaken with all that hullabaloo, he might as well have been deaf.

There is chaos in our lives all the time. But to drown it out is what could differentiate the happy from the rest.

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Hailer

Ride hailing services in India at least have become funny.

Years ago, if you’d want to take a ride in the middle of the night, you’d have to already know a cab driver who’d come and pick you up. Heaven forbid if he slept off or forgot, that would have been a missed flight right there.

Now if you want to hail a ride, you select it on the app. The driver first calls you to find out where you want to go. If he doesn’t like your destination, he will cancel the ride. This can happen 3-4 times before you are successful in booking a cab. When the cabbie comes, he will ask if you will pay by cash. This is because ride hailing companies only pay their drivers at the end of the week. And then the driver will insist on “cancelling the ride on the app”, so that he can pocket the entire fare for himself.

As mentioned in the Gita, all progress is the Lord’s creation only. But progress comes with its own challenges. Because of the involvement of the human mind – bringing with it greed, anger, jealousy and fear.

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Trigger

Someone I know was faced with a really tough situation recently.

He struggled at first – just like anyone else in that situation would have.

And then he did something amazing.

He declared that this tough situation is nothing but a trigger.

A trigger for him to correct his earlier mistakes. To fast track some changes that were on the backburner. And to ensure that the situation is viewed as nothing more than an opportunity to improve.

And what a change that made to his life.

Just phenomenal how a change in attitude can change your life.

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Unconditional

The world is struggling with racism.

It’s not just about black or white, but even shades within each.

Income inequality adds salt to the wounds.

As do title, wealth, power and status.

But all of this is acquired.

Observe any baby. Like an 8 month old.

They don’t care about your height or weight or the bald head or the mole on the chin.

They don’t even care if you are the parent, or the nanny.

They love unconditionally. That’s life in its purest form.

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10,000 by 3

Remember Malcolm Gladwell’s 10,000 hour practice rule? You practice anything for 10,000 hours and you’ll become world class (like a concert violinist or pianist or a professional soccer or cricket player).

The breakup was that if you can practice something for 3 hours a day for 10 years, you’ll easily achieve an unparalleled level of expertise.

For many of us, even taking out 1 hour a day to do something we’d loosely classify as a “hobby” would be extremely difficult.

And if we did get the 1 hour out of an already maddening schedule, then it’d just be better to unwind with Netflix or Prime no?

One way I like to look at this, is to put in the 10,000 hours at our work. Our office job. The day job. Whatever it may be. And guess what, we work 9 hours a day anyway. So that’s 3 times more than the 3 hours per day needed for mastery in 10 years. Which means we could be masters at our work if we spend just 3.3 years!

Instead of spending time by the water cooler, gossiping and talking politics and what not, why not just use every single opportunity to learn, spend the 9 hours in the most efficient manner possible, and become the best-of-the-best in your line of work, whatever it might be? šŸ˜„

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