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Category: love

Coochie

Under the same roof:

If one coochie-coos with a baby, and the baby likes it, onlookers may say the baby loves that person.

If one coochie-coos with a baby, and the baby likes it, onlookers may say the person loves that baby.

If one coochie-coos with a baby, and the baby likes it, onlookers may say the baby is getting attached to that person.

If one coochie-coos with a baby, and the baby likes it, onlookers may say the person is getting too attached to the baby.

No matter what one does, someone will not like the coochie cooing. Oh what a mess only.

Think this is a mess? Ask the family that just lost its babies, or mommies, or other love-givers.

Adult humans are wired to find fault. Only not in themselves.

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Divorced from reality – part 2

Twitter has been awash with memes and posts on the recent divorce announcement of a tech mogul.

No more comments on that.

But one thing that did come up was an interesting thread written on the “gradations of the rich”. The premise is that we usually think rich = awesome = same benefits. But one guy has gone into more detail. All ‘rich’ is not equal. Pretty interesting:

  1. Net worth US$ 10m to 30m – all needs met, fly first class, 4/5 star stays, some business stress, not yet ultra HNI
  2. NW US$ 30m to 100m – fly private jet, multiple global residences, own big company, own cool cars, socialize with elite
  3. NW US$ 100m to 1bn – all of above + socialize with movie stars, corporate elite, any car you want. But very hard to find family and friends who love you for who you are, i.e. irrespective of your money
  4. NW US$ 1bn+ – You can literally buy access, influence, experiences, impact, respect and even time (by saying no to things/anyone that were otherwise not possible). But even at this level, one thing you cannot buy is love. Why? Because to love someone means to sacrifice for that person. But all the money you have means you never need to sacrifice anything. Probably explains why the top 10 richest people in the world have 13 divorces amongst them

In any case, it is not easy to be at the top of this list, always having to look over your shoulder. Thoughts?

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Bharatha 600BC

There is an awesome board game called Bharatha 600BC, created and released by a company called GoIndia Games. It’s quite unique because such games that are made in India are rare. The map of the game itself is beautiful – featuring ancient India from – you guessed it – 600 BC!

The game makes for fun family bonding time – especially offering a clean hour or three. ‘Clean’ meaning no screen diversions (mobiles, tablets, TVs etc) – wow is that even possible these days?

The board game has plenty of paths to victory – and one can use tact, strategy, battle, speed, rationing (i.e. hoarding) of resources, using special cards – you name it.

One interesting thing that happens when we play with my mother, is that she will never battle, and she will also always ‘give up’ resources for the rest of the family to win. “Oh, how can I battle my own son!”, or “You want resources, here take mine” – much to the groans of others “come on ma, this is supposed to be a competitive game – leave your familial bonds aside!”

While there are groans during the game, one must look behind the curtain. The motherly love kicks in with feelings of compassion overruling everything else – and not just during board games but even otherwise. What if we too can apply such compassion/empathy all the time. Just like the Guru does. Wouldn’t that be the true application of everything we learn in our scriptures?

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Reply

Is there a way to make someone happy and praise them while also keeping the bar high? Here’s how my Guru did it once.

Many years ago, one of the satsangis went to him for advice. The satsangi was a bit nervous, as he told Guruji that this was his first time speaking in public on the Gita, and that he was a little scared. Guruji asked him which chapter was assigned to him. He said, “Chapter 7, Guruji.”

Guruji replied thus:
1. Wow, chapter 7, such a beautiful chapter, I’m so happy you got it! [infusing happiness]
2. You know what? My first talk too was on chapter 7. It is easy, and I know your capability, you can do it. [genuine praise]
3. I also prepared hard for it – I had read the chapter over 500 times, so that my session is worth my audience’s time. [setting the bar high]

Isn’t this such an inspiring reply, and something for us to learn?

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True greatness

Traditionally, we equate greatness to money, wealth, fame, riches, cars, bungalows, yachts, CEOs, Chairmen, senior management, foreign travel, foreign vacations, first and business class, limousines and a variety of other things.

But Martin Luther King Jr. had the final word on this.

Everybody can be great…because anybody can serve. You don’t have to have a college degree to serve. You don’t have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love.

He understood that greatness wasn’t about oneself, but how much one could use themselves for others.

No different from what Lord Krishna states in the Gita. As my Guru observes in the purport after chapter 13 verse 26 in his Amazing Simple Gita, “Many missions have realized that if we keep only the goal of realising the Lord we will tend towards laziness with only arguments and discussions. Prabhupad for example made it very clear that devotion means devotional service, chanting sixteen malas, trikala pooja etc is important but afterwards what will we be doing – we should be doing seva (service), spreading this knowledge, making more and more people noble and good.”

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Extrama

We had an interesting discussion during satsang a few days ago. It was on a topic called Unlawful Love, authored by Thiruvalluvar in the Kural. The author has written with such emphasis, “It may seem all too easy to err with another’s wife, but the disgrace will be irredeemable for all time”.

There are so many examples of people ruining themselves and their images, simply because they couldn’t control themselves. Ravana lusting after Sita, Shantanu (nearly on his death-bed) lusting for the fisherwoman Satyavati, the Bill Clinton – Monica Lewinsky affair, Tiger Woods and his extra maritals – the list goes on.

This is perhaps not so different from discontentment with our money, gadgets, cars, houses etc. We just want more and more. And quickly get bored. We can probably replace a car or gadget with a newer model, but doing that with a wife / husband? Treacherous!

The challenge lies in the motive behind marriage. For most, it is purely physical, maybe a little emotional. To find someone who can act as a bottomless pit for their partner’s worries and troubles of life. But the wisdom of the ancients suggest that marriage primarily had a deeply spiritual component. The word vivaah in Sanskrit I’ve read means ‘to flow together’. Flow where? Towards liberation, which is the dharma of each individual. Interesting also then is that the sanskrit word for wife is dharmapatni.

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2021

A simple but important blog post to ring in the new year. Here are five things for me to work on, so as to get the best from 2021.

  1. Every day, all day, be happy and grateful for everything we already have. Success, money, fame will come automatically.
  2. Zero compromise on health (i.e. proper nutrition and exercise) – for if there’s one thing an invisible virus from 2020 has taught us, it is that without a fit body and mind, everything else is pointless.
  3. Give / donate / help generously and selflessly. This is the only way to purify the mind and intellect. (Why? Because it removes the notion of ego / i-i-i)
  4. Join a satsang and / or actively participate in one. Repeatedly dunking the mind in scriptural knowledge as guided by the Guru and applying it in our lives will fast track our spiritual transformation.
  5. Enjoy every single moment, and look at every stumbling block as an opportunity to improve. As they say, there are no failures, only lessons.

Are these easy to follow? Do you have other things you would like to focus on? Would love to hear your thoughts in the comments section below. All the best for 2021!

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Rub it in

Contrary to expectations, animals do not always crave food from us, although they would certainly like it if we brought some along!

There’s a kitty in the area where I live. I’d taken some milk with me today when I went down. The cat was half asleep as most cats always are (apparently some sleep up to 18 hours a day!).

He didn’t seem to care that I’d got him some food. He looked up for a bit, then yawned and stretched and went back to sleep. I tried making some sounds, some hand claps, some fake (and ridiculous sounding) “meow”s. Nothing. No interest at all today.

What he does love though, is for me to sit on the parapet, and then to perch himself on my leg so that he can enjoy a good long neck rub. And because a picture is a worth a 1000 words, the image up top is him caught in the act šŸ™‚

The moment I sat down today, his ears perked up, his head turned in my direction, he did a super quick stretch, and he was next to me in under three seconds. I wonder where his sleep vanished!

People are no different. We try to impress others with our money, our possessions, our skills, our diction, our knowledge, our credentials and many many other things. But the only thing we need, to truly win them over, is our love and affection. If we treat others with love, then it doesn’t matter if we are poor or dumb – people will flock to us.

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