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Many do not want to work regular jobs nowadays.
They want to be free from the rat race.
They want to ‘start-up’.
Because start-ups can make them a lot of money, while they work on their own terms.
They think they will get peace of mind this way.
But speak to those who have experienced both.
“There is no difference at all”, they say.
The race might be different, but everyone is still a rat only.
Leave a Comment“I’m a mispriced asset”, is what a friend told me recently. He took up his job because he didn’t have a choice. He wanted to break into a specific market, and because he didn’t have the relevant work experience, he had to take a pay cut.
We know how this story ends right? The guy after 3 years in his ‘compromise’ job, managed to get another offer elsewhere, better pay, and before you know it, it was mispricing no more.
Each of us who is in the corporate world comes across this question often. How much am I worth?
The answer as the experts will tell you, is not your intrinsic value. Rather, what you are worth, is simply what someone is willing to pay you. Aka, the greater fool theory. It’s just like the stock market, or the market for art or collectibles, or cryptos or NFTs today. If someone will pay 10, then why settle for 6?
While this is great in the business world, it doesn’t matter in anything in life outside of economic comparisons. Keep wealth aside, and the equations change. If you pay for your house help’s kids’ education, they will likely shower you with more gratitude than any billionaire could hope to amass.
But even that, is looking outward. Your real value, only you can ascribe. And that too might be quite limiting, and mispriced.
Leave a CommentNope, this one is not about the President’s wife.
This is about an amazing true story I heard on a podcast recently. The lady in question was the first female employee at Ford Motors many decades ago. And what a crazy journey she had getting there!
This was being recited by the lady’s son. She grew up in a refugee camp on the Indo-Pak border. There was no running water and no electricity. But she did something really amazing. She taught herself how to read. And the first book that she read from cover to cover was the biography of Henry Ford. She started visualizing that she wanted to be an engineer at Ford Motor Co.
This looked unlikely if not impossible, but somehow her parents saved every penny and managed to put her on a boat to America. She ended up getting a scholarship, and graduated as the only female engineer in her class. The next day she was in Detroit to find some way or the other to apply for her dream job. The man she met there said, “Sorry, we don’t have any female engineers. Goodbye.” To which the lady made her case, detailing everything she had gone through to get to this point. The man was moved, and said he would take it up to fight for her. She ended up being the first lady at Ford Motor Co., back in 1967.
What about us, what do we do in the face of adversity?
Leave a CommentEveryone talks of software coding to be the next great money-spinning skill in life. I don’t know much about that, but I did see one nice quip by a child recently. “Coding is nothing but a glorified bunch of ifs and for loops.”
Our lives aren’t very different. We keep repeating various patterns and rituals like for loops. We also are faced with many conditionalities, like the ifs, based on which we make certain choices and move ahead in life.
But the real problem? We worry about the ifs. A lot! What if this happens, or what if that happens. Constant worrying.
So here’s a lovely story about tackling the what ifs.
You know Sparta, the ancient Greek city famed for having really tough citizens. King Phillip II of Macedonia had invaded many other neighbouring territories, and then he set his target on Sparta.
King Phillip sent a letter to the Spartans in advance. “Should he come as a friend or a foe?” They replied, “Neither.”
So Phillip sent another message. “I advise you to submit without further delay, for if I bring my army into your land I will destroy your farms, slay your people and raze your city.”
Once more, the Spartans replied with just one word: “If.”
Leave a CommentWe’ve probably heard the phrase, “pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.”
The Buddha teaches this in another way as well, with the concept of the two arrows.
Any time we go through a rough patch, or a bad event occurs, it is like being hit with one arrow. That’s bad right?
Now imagine you yourself pickup the bow, and shoot another arrow, at yourself. That’s even worse, and that’s the second arrow.
The first arrow touches our skin, or body, physically in some way perhaps. Maybe we didn’t get the reward we thought we deserved, and so a pain in the neck, some tears, some lightness of the head etc. Okay gone. But then, if we continue to cogitate on this, we allow the second arrow to pierce much deeper – right into the mind and the heart.
Which is to say, that at any given point, even if things aren’t as messed up as we think, we prefer to tell ourselves that it is really really really messed up.
Best way out? Use the second arrow as a learning experience. Find a way to ascribe some meaning to the pain. And then we’ll realize that it wasn’t pain in the first place, but an opportunity in disguise.
Leave a CommentThe opening lines of a podcast I was listening to recently were eye opening.
It was all about innovation.
Everyone loves innovation. We want newer gadgets, faster gadgets, cooler gadgets.
And its not just gadgets, but even services. Anything that helps get our work done better and faster.
So what was this podcast saying?
That innovation is all about only one thing.
“Failure”
That one has to fail, if they have to innovate, because it is inherently an iterative process.
But schools and social media and the world in general is all about glorifying the exact opposite of failure. “Success”
How can we hope to succeed, if we don’t know how to fail?
Leave a Commentis what one would think if they are asked to read books like Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People. As we have discussed here before many times, my Guru absolutely loves the book.
Why do people consider it boring nonsense? Because it only emphasizes the basics. Like deeply listening to people (not just hearing them). Making eye contact. Smiling. Being interested in the other person. Not criticising others, at least not publicly. And so many other such simple things.
There is no magic formula. No get rich quick scheme. And hence reading the same ‘basic’ book 10 times appears to offer limited value.
The problem lies only in the fact that one is trying to read 10 times but implementing not even once. Every day I see this ‘lack of implementation’ around me (and surely I’m guilty as well). In a recent meet up with friends, no one bothered to check on the other person, because everyone was too busy peddling their own stories. Think about it – how many people outside of your immediate family checked on you in the last year or so? And now vice versa? People are also rude to waiters and househelp. People are forgetting to use their mouths for the one awesome thing God made them for in the first place – to smile! (no, not to talk) etc etc etc.
The basics may be boring nonsense, but the basics are exactly how to win people. And if we want to win success, then we need to win people first.
Leave a CommentNow that we understand no one really is thinking about us, how can we use this to improve our lives? Easy. By ‘letting go’. By being sincere, but not serious. By taking things with a smile, but not lightly. Read this:
When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.
—Lao Tzu
When I let go of what I have, I receive what I need.
Isn’t this just phenomenal advice? For instance, we might feel tensed and anxious before an important meeting. We are already well prepared and know the outcome. But still, there are those butterflies – “what if it doesn’t go well?” And once the meeting is over? Almost instantly we feel better, no matter the outcome.
That’s why letting go is so important. Letting go of our need to be perfect in everything – looks, speech, writing, presentation, cooking, and everything else.
But letting go doesn’t mean we don’t care. Letting go only means “okay if it happens, and okay if it doesn’t”. Once we ‘let go’, we stop focusing on the future, and how others may or may not perceive us (and we know most people don’t have the time to care!). Instead, we begin to enjoy and live in the present.
Leave a CommentHere’s a question you should try to hazard a guess about: How many people this very moment, anywhere in the world, whoever they may be, are thinking about you?
Most likely zero? Or maybe one or two? And even in that case, do you think they are thinking about you in a nice way? Or because they want to go out of their way to do something for you? Or is it because they are jealous, or want something from you? Most likely the latter, isn’t it?
As the US Federal Reserve said in 2020, they are not even “thinking about thinking about raising interest rates.” In the context of this post, most people are so self-absorbed that they aren’t even thinking about thinking about us.
Then why do we spend so much time worrying about how others perceive us? Is it really possible to keep everyone happy? Do they even care how we look or feel? This is not to say that the people around us are bad. It is just that they (and we) are all wired in a particular way. We live as though the universe revolves around us, that’s just how it works.
Then why do we worry so much? And what to do about this? Concluded tomorrow…
Leave a CommentContinuing from yesterday, here are some awesome snippets from the book 6 Months to Live by Dr. Sangeeta Raman Girdhar.
As mentioned yesterday, today’s and tomorrow’s posts will contain some gems from the amazing book 6 Months to Live (available here).
Concluded tomorrow, with some more gems!
Leave a CommentThere’s an outstanding short-book that I just finished reading.
It’s called 6 Months To Live, and written by Dr. Sangeeta Raman Girdhar.
The book is only about 70-odd pages long, and can easily be finished in one sitting, and within the hour.
But the convenient length of the book not the reason everyone should read it.
What the book captures so beautifully, is a combination of 4 things:
I’m going to share a few powerful takeaways from the book over the next couple of days, but the book has much more than just these, so do consider reading it. The author is my cousin sister, who is an amazing human being. The least I can do is feature her work on FHN! The book is available here.
Leave a CommentWe’ve all got quite accustomed to hearing victory speeches for awards ceremonies like the Oscars.
Celebrities take to the stage, and then thank a long list of people, including their cast members, the director, the stunt team, the writer, the choreographer and so on.
In a similar speech by singer/rapper Snoop Dogg, he had an interesting sentence to add.
“I’d like to thank me.”
And then he gives out a sly grin, and then repeats.
“I’d like to thank me, for believing in me.”
Maybe he was kidding, maybe he wasn’t. But in this age of increased stress, anxiety and inferiority complexes, it is surely a great feeling to back oneself up.
Leave a CommentWe never say “Oh look, his leg has gone for a walk”, or “hey her hand is making food in the kitchen”, do we? No we don’t, because we always consider everything about a person to be one singular entity.
In the Gita, Lord Krishna breaks it up, and for good reason. He says there is a clear pecking order:
Gross body < sense organs < mind < intellect < HE
This is to say, that it is our body and sense organs that get attracted to sense objects, because they give in to desires.
If we are able to use our intellect to focus the (monkey) mind on to HE, then that would be cool wouldn’t it? No need to worry about desires much then. But how to do it? Through karma yoga, aka the principle that work is worship (remember The secret to success at work?).
Also, this is a step by step process. When we know we are doing something bad, and we want to change it, we immediately try to jettison it, throw it out – and then we struggle with withdrawal symptoms. Whereas My Guru’s approach is always more measured, calibrated and sustainable. How? By aiming for something higher, so that whatever is lower and weaker, will automatically drop off. Work is good, but working selflessly as worship is the highest good.
Leave a Comment“How can we get rid of corruption, and how can I prevent myself from becoming more corrupt, as I earn more money?”, was the question asked by a disciple to Sadhguru. I listened to this on a podcast, and found the answer enlightening.
Power corrupts. Isn’t this the famous statement we have all heard so many times? And we look nastily at bureaucrats and politicians as if they are solely to blame. Maybe some of them are, who knows.
However, Sadhguru’s take is different. What does he say?
That people are either corrupt, or not corrupt. It has nothing to do with power. How so?
He links this back to spirituality. Our corruption starts from the moment we identify with ourselves. Not just ourselves, but only ourselves. Because that means we favour only us over someone else. This is the seeds of corruption being sown right there. And then, we get married, have kids, have a large family to take care of and so on. Which means only one thing. More corruption.
The way out? To stop being so self-centered, and to be a citizen of the world. That’s why my Guru doesn’t pray for small small things anymore. His only objects of prayer? Desh (country) and dharma.
Leave a CommentAn 18 February 1882 newspaper carried an advertisement for cigarettes with the following benefits:
This was a time when even doctors and nurses were not just smoking themselves, but also encouraging their patients to follow suit.
We may think we have come a long way – evolved. Yes we have, at least when it comes to smoking.
But there are so many things today’s generation has little clue about. Parenting. Food choices. Exercising. Health choices. Professional choices. Lifestyle choices.
Another 100 years, and people from then will look back at us and laugh. All the while going through their own sets of blind follies.
Leave a CommentYou probably know the story of the 3 old men who were invited into a home. They were love, wealth and success. But they refused to all go in together. So the house owner had to choose which one he wanted. And he chose well, i.e. he picked love. Automatically, the 2 men representing wealth and success followed as well. If he had chosen either of the other two, the home would have only had that chosen one.
This is a nice story, and is probably very true. My thoughts are of a sliding scale, with spiritual success at one end, and economic success at the other.
No doubt, most of us are hankering for economic success. Our every breath is directed towards earning more or reaching higher. While such focus is admirable, does it really give us peace of mind? Even if we wanted a way out, do we have any time left for a spiritual search?
The alternative, at the other end of the sliding scale is better. If we are steeped in spirituality, if we understand the non-permanence of it all, if we realize that all that we seek is within, then the scale itself will disappear. Much like the 3 old men who all traipsed in together, spiritual success automatically brings all other successes with it. But no other success will matter much at that time. Win-win!
Leave a CommentSurely you’ve heard of that neighbor’s son who’s so successful right?
We all live in different apartments, towns, cities, countries and even continents. Yet we all have those “neighbour’s sons / daughters” that we are invariably compared with.
This is not about comparing with others, as much as it is about our own definitions of success. But can we really define our success?
Were we successful when we cleared first grade? Or weren’t we?
How about when we cleared grade 12? How about when we graduated? When we got a job? Or when we got another job, and then another and another? How about when we were promoted to head of a department? Or when we started our own company? Or when we donated a decent sum to the charity of our choice? Or when we were able to use our ‘influence’ to recommend a friend to a good job? Or when we got to the Board of Directors? Or CEO or Chairman of a small company? Of a large company? Of a Fortune 500?
Who decides if we are successful or not? Is it really us? Or is it an arbitrary line in the sand, drawn by someone else, that declares that you have arrived?
Leave a CommentIn chapter 3 of the Bhagavad Gita, Lord Krishna provides an interesting break-up of karma yoga.
This comes in verse 30. Here is how we could break it down for daily application:
1. “Renounce everything to the Lord” = make spirituality a priority in life, which will make life peaceful and content. Let it not just be a 5 minute activity, but the substratum of every waking moment.
2. “Quality matters” = Work in the best way possible; treating it like worship, with the knowledge that this is the highest offering there is. The benefit? We wont slack off or cut corners, irrespective of whether someone is inspecting or not.
3. Niraashi = no aasha, no expectation or hope of a specific outcome = receive the result with grace.
4. Nirmama = no mamakaar = no ‘i’ness = work with the attitude of custodianship; i.e. none of my achievements are possible without the support of those around me.
5. vigata-jJwara = “without fever” = this is not body temperature, but the fever of the mind, i.e. stress and anxiety, which can be eradicated if the above points are followed.
Such a nice and implementable way to live, isn’t it?
Leave a CommentNo today’s post is not about meme stocks or meme cryptos or meme NFTs. Although it is interesting that the word meme was coined by Richard Dawkins in his 1976 book called The Selfish Gene, and the book title has a clue!
But here’s a really short story you may have come across.
An exceptional doctor was nearing his end. He didn’t want to die though. So he created another version of himself, right down to the tiniest detail. Both him and his alter-image were laid down on beds side by side, absolutely still, not a movement. When Death approach, it got confused, because the two were impossible to tell apart. So then Death played a trick. It said, “I know which of you is the real doctor, because the real one made a mistake.”
The real doctor blurted out, “That’s impossible, there’s no mistake.” And Death immediately said, “There you go, that’s the mistake!”, obviously referring to the man’s me-me-me, aka ego.
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